Am I Wrong for Feeling Hurt My MIL Excluded My Daughter?

Image credits: shurkin_son (not the actual photo)

Infertility and miscarriage grief:

Studies show that infertility and miscarriage can cause profound emotional distress, including feelings of isolation, failure, and jealousy when seeing others with children. It’s common for individuals in Ashley’s position to struggle during milestones or gatherings where children are present. (Source: American Psychological Association)

Family Dynamics and Conflict:

Families often face challenges when attempting to accommodate individuals’ emotional needs, especially when these needs conflict. Exclusion as a method of “problem-solving” is rarely effective and can exacerbate divisions. Research on family cohesion emphasizes the importance of open communication and equitable treatment to avoid alienation. (Source: Journal of Family Psychology)

Impact on New Mothers:

Excluding OP and her baby disregards the importance of inclusion during a time when new mothers often seek familial support. The postpartum period can be emotionally sensitive, and feeling unsupported or excluded can contribute to feelings of inadequacy or alienation. (Source: Mayo Clinic)

Alternative Solutions:

Approaches like establishing designated times to celebrate or finding middle-ground compromises often preserve family harmony. For example, Ashley and OP could discuss boundaries directly to avoid triangulation through the MIL.